Showing posts with label douche bags. Show all posts
Showing posts with label douche bags. Show all posts

Saturday, October 18, 2008

This One Is On Me...

Ok... I've had a couple of minutes now to gather my thoughts and I have to say I might have had something to do with the outcome of today's game... as a matter of fact this loss might be completely on me. During the Florida game I created, what I thought were, the correct conditions for watching an Ole Miss game. Today, however, I realized at halftime that I had not re-created said conditions. Apparently, during the Florida game I found the lucky spot on our couch. I also carried a broken piece of table from my kids' room (the lucky stick) and had my Ole Miss hat on. Today, i was distracted by the fact that we were in the midst of garage sale... before you lay into me, it ended well before kick-off... but I'll say it had me thinking of things other than the game this afternoon. Anyway, as the first half came to a close I realized that I, like the Rebels, needed to make some adjustments. I was sitting on the wrong side of the couch, I didn't have my hat and the stick was no where to be found. By the time the third quarter started I was on the other side of the couch, my hat was on my head and, whatdya know, the stick was still under the couch where it landed as I lost consciousness during the Florida game. With the universe re-aligned we saw a very different game in the second half. Turns out it might have been too little too late... So, in a very Tebowesque way, complete with quiver lip and tight chest, I tell you that no one will work harder the rest of the season to make sure I am on the right side of the couch with hat and lucky stick in hand... I want to apologize to the whole Rebel nation... No one will work harder to make sure our entire fan base will create the correct mojo to insure a trip to Memphis or at least Shreveport during the holidays. Again, I want to apologize to the entire Rebel nation. I didn't respect the mojo... what's that you say... No, the 10 points we gave them on turnovers didn't really come into play.
One other thing...

This guy, Gary Danielson, is a major douchebag. I don't think I've ever heard such butt kissing in all my life. I mean, everyone knows Tim Brando and Les Miles are (not so) secret love buddies. But who knows what goes on between Gary, John Parker and Saban? If I ever completely lose it and go on a nationwide killing spree I'm only going to shoot Brando's dog but Gary, you made the list. I hope we never play on CBS ever again!

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Rammer Jamme... I can't even type it!


The pride of the tide nation... poor Bear being immortalized on the back of this tool!
And should we forget this taste of class...

Monday, August 4, 2008

Attentions turned...

I've been focusing my attention as of late on those bumbling idiots from Tuscaloser, but I have recently been reminded that I don't have to cross state lines to find the heights of stupidity.  Yes, my memory has been jogged by the fellow below and his touching story that, while we might be down, we are not out.  Thanks to the Mississippi State Welcome Wagon for snapping me back to reality and helping me to realize that win or lose... things aren't that bad!